Valentine’s day approaches, and as usual, many will be trying to make a hastened decision as to what to purchase for a loved one, or for a potential loved one. It is certainly interesting how such a originally religious celebration has become a lexicon for the non-religious expression of amorous love and lust.
We all have our own tales to tell, of both heartbreak and romance, and in the spirit of the now commercialised celebration, I will give an example of both, in the hope of showing just how profound an impact Valentine’s day can have, whilst still being a celebration that barely renders on the scale of importance for most of the populous.
During my late teenage years, I was enamoured with a girl who at the time was the vision of perfection, I was often overcome with emotion and platitudes whenever I was in her presence, but alas, I was never really on her radar. I was her confidante, someone she trusted with her life and her most intimate secrets, but not the one who’s lips she kissed and hand she held.
Being the romantic that I tend to be, I did what most impulsive teenagers have a tendency of doing, I pondered and planned a large romantic gesture which would in no doubt win her heart and have her unstated feelings of love for me come pouring out, or so I thought. I spent hours racking my hormone addled brain and decided on two things, poetry and jewellery.
I managed to put the meagre savings I had at the time, into a diamond bracelet, and began writing a poem which, frankly to this day, makes me cringe at the mere thought of both the idiocy of my words at the time, as well as the poor standard of it, though to my hormonal brain at the time, this was pure genius.
I had it all planned out, I was to arrange to meet her in town, conquer my nerves and express my undying love. Arrangements were made and we met in town, I was a bundle of nerves and anticipation. We sat down and just chewed the proverbial fat whilst I steadied my nerves. When I finally was able to muster up the courage, before I could reveal my infallible scheme, she uttered words that would break my heart into a thousand pieces. She had met someone, and was overflowing with emotion and hyperbole as to how this was the love of her life.
It turned out in the end, that he was not, but hindsight is a wonderful thing, and my teenage heart and mind was crushed, it felt like the wind had been knocked out of me, for a few moments, I could scarcely breathe. I made my excuses and headed home, I never did give her the bracelet, I gave it to my Grandmother as a gift, and I have no regret in doing so to this day. Things would obviously get far better, but on that Valentine’s day, I was convinced that it was the worst day of my life and that I would never recover from the pain, melodramatic indeed.
However, seven years ago, the unexpected happened. This time, I was in a relationship and decided to be thoughtful with my gift and compiled a CD of the short time we had shared at that point. It took me hours to be able to perfect it, and in all honesty, I felt that I could have done far better than I ended up doing. Again arrangements were made to meet up, and we proceeded to meet at the abode at which I resided at this point in time.
When this lady arrived, we exchanged gifts and cards, and I remember she was overcome with emotions and tears flowed, and again we exchanged our undying love. At this point in time, we had been engaged for a grand total of two months, and had known each other for about four months. Looking back, most would say it is sheer fallacy to profess such deep love at that point in a relationship. In our defence, we were inseparable, married seven months later, and had our first child together thirteen months later, and have been together ever since.
So yes, Valentine’s day is insignificant in the grand scheme of things and can be full of meaningless moments, romances and heartbreaks. However it can also be full of moments that last a lifetime, forging bonds between souls that are never sundered. On the first Valentine’s day I mentioned here, I was heartbroken… for about two weeks. On the second Valentine’s day here, I was creating memories with the woman that turned out to be my soul mate. Valentine’s day is a mere moment in time, make sure you capture the ones that matter.